I'm a happy panda!

P.S.

You know what's awesome?

I'm totally going to be able to have some of my wedding cake on my wedding day. That's an accomplishment, in my opinion

Hey, so I have a "new accesory" I'm flaunting

It's kind of perminant. I mean, technically it wouldn't have to be perminant, but I'm making it that way. It's how it should be. Besides, I wouldn't want to get rid of this. It's very special to me lol.

And no, I'm not talking about my eating disorder recovery symbol tattoo.

This is something new I got yesterday...

I guess  I should stop teasing you all..

WHO WANTS TO KNOW THE SURPRISE?!

*I do mention numbers in this post. If you think hearing a little about calories/fat would be dangerous to your health/recovery, please reconsider reading this. It's not a lot about numbers, but I do mention the numbers of a food item. Just a warning*

I went grocery shopping this afternoon while Trey was at work.

I bought some blueberry and some strawberry-banana yogurts.

I bought the light great-value kind, so I thought.

I must opened the blueberry and began eating on it, only to realize I didn't grab the light I grabbed the low fat.

Instead of it being 80 calories and no fat for the 6 oz., it's 150 calories and 1.5 grams of fat per 6 oz.

Used to.. I would've thrown it away the current yogurt away and given the rest away to someone else. New Reilly, is going to eat and enjoy this yogurt and pay attention more closely next time I go shopping.

Because I don't give a fuck about the numbers. Eating a few yogurts that have a higher calories content than I normally do isn't going to kill me.

There's more important stuff to life than worry over a few numbers.

Still owe you all a proper update. It'll happen eventually.

As for now here's my halloween costume..

Picture quality is poor, but I only had my cell phone for a camera so yeah.. sorry.

Everything at work went well tonight with the exception of having a stranger grab my ass as I was taking a picture of Derrick and some girl together. That pissed me off.

My ass is mine and mine only.

If you don't know me you don't touch it.

Even if you know me, unless you have my permission you don't touch it.

Respect. Boundaries. Manners. LEARN THESE SKILLS!

Rant over. Waiting for Trey and his friends, Josh and Brendon, to get back from the concert.

• I'm still alive, I swear.
• I've been super busy.
• Life's been going pretty wonderfully, if I do say so myself.
• I have a lot to fill you in on when I ever get time. 
• Trey left last night to go to South Carolina to see his li'l sister graduate from boot camp.
• I miss him already. Saturday needs to come NAAAOWWW! lol
• I have a ton of exams and papers due this week.
• Assuming they don't completely rape me, I'll try to update you later.

 I'm also going to be doing a video so you can chose to listen to that, read this, or do both. It's whatever you want.

Sorry it's taken me so long to get back to you guys with the meaning of my tattoo. I've finally managed to make some time for it this morning though, so here it goes...

1) The whole symbol itself is the eating disorder recovery symbol.

2) The red on the left side is for anorexia.

3) The purple on the left is "periwinkle". When it comes to ribbons, the periwinkle ribbon is used for eating disorder awareness. The periwinkle ink, however, looked more blue than I wanted so I opted for a dark periwinkle/purple.

4) The tattoo being on my wrist is to signify that this is the last time that I will ever purposefully have pain inflected upon my wrists.

If you don't like the fact that I have a tattoo...

You can suck it..

(old picture, but the message fits)

'cause I love my tattoo and I am proud of what it means.

I am a recovered anorexic.

I will never cut myself again.

I have a strength inside myself that I never knew I had before.

I'm a survivor.

71 days recovered & 164 days clean from cutting

{It looks a little blurry in the video, but that's just because I had just put A&D ointment on it}

And then to tag everyone who commented on the revealing post so you'll be sure to see this post explaining the meaning...

@skinnyme_prettyme,

@belleorecluses,

@unconventionalbutterfly,

@sf2slc, - The black outlining hurt worse than the coloring in, but it wasn't too bad. Definitely worth it.

@righteousbruin, - Lol! No, no, no. I'm just a clutz and fell asleep on the couch with Trey. I move in my sleep a lot so I flipped off the couch and hit my arm on a chair on my way down

@mysoldier_myworld,

@cennedi,

@marcusjoh,

@feyenigma,

@oflostthings,

@malestop,

@unrevealedtruth_xo, - No one did My parents sort of knew because ran it by them to make sure they were cool with it, but they had no idea when I was doing it. Aside from Trey, it was a surprise to everyone!

@sentimentaldoll,

@chuellesee, - Someone suggested the shoulder/back area, but I wanted it where I could see it plus the other meaning the wrist has  (as I wrote up there). It's actually red and purple/"dark periwinkle" I love you too baby girl <3

@bloggicus_maximus, - Golden Lotus. It was between Seventh Street and this place in Sherwood my boyfriend got his done and I decided to go there. Turns out they closed for freakin' Columbus Day (wtf?!) so I went down the street to Golden Lotus instead.

@equalpacketzzz,

@damagedgo0ds,

@ctaretz,

@missrobynrenee,

@thecowboy2010,

@hopethatitglows, - I do too! Plus I love you <3

@under_the_carpet,

I've been absent so much lately.

Sorry.

It's just, the internet becomes so much less important when you're out actually living life and enjoying yourself.

Trey's at drill this weekend, so I'm about to do some seriously studying. If I need/get a break I'll try to update you all on the meaning behind the tat

All right, I feel kind of bad for not getting the secret out yet, so I'm just going to show you what it is and later (probably next post) I'll explain the meaning behind it.

There will be some of you who have no idea what it is...

There will be some of you who know what the symbol is...

Though there's more symbolism than meets the eye.

All together it four four different thing this represents.. so keep an eye out for that post.

{Hell, I may just tag everyone in the post who comments here?}

Oh, and one last thing.... no talking about this outside of xanga. I want it to be a surprise for my sister when she gets home next time, and I can't have this getting out on facebook

Okay, so without further ado....

Right after the artist finished it... and look it's Trey's foot

Haha, listening to "There For You" by FlyLeaf :3

Oh, and that huge ass black/purple bruise I had is almost gone!

I love it.

Shortly here I will be revealing the big change I had made yesterday. I've heard many people voice that they think I'm getting a hair cut.

Since I really need to be studying for my lab exam tomorrow, I'm going to do that while I allow you to all guess what the new thing is.

Winner may just get a prize

GUESS AWAY!

*Rec this cause I said so*